Beauty Therapy
So, I spent my birthday in the usual flu-infested fug which was bad enough. I then decided to go to work the next day because I didn’t want to let people down at the last minute. Who would have thought a 12-hour day spent on your feet was a bad idea if you have the flu? A pharmacist, you say? Moving on swiftly, let’s draw a veil over that whole sorry episode.
Two bedridden days later, I have surfaced to deal with packaging orders and EU notifications. I think I prefer the flu. My only recourse is an overdose of beauty, hence the lovely pictures I’ve included today. Those amazing rooms are at the Kameha Grand Hotel in Zurich. I’d basically just move in if I could.
I leave you with some cheesy jokes just in case any of you feel as rotten as I do….
Joke no 1: A man walked into a bar and said ‘Ouch!’
Joke no 2: Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake. “I’ll go into town for a doctor,” the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the only doctor delivering a baby.
“I can’t leave,” the doctor says. “But here’s what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground.”
The guy runs back to his friend, who is in agony. “What did the doctor say?” the victim cries.
“He says you’re gonna die.”
Joke no 3: My neighbor is in the Guinness World Records. He has had 44 concussions. He lives very close to me. A stone’s throw away, in fact.
Joke no 1 is actually pretty much my favourite joke. Should I be worried? Have a warm and toasty evening.
PS- If you are looking for something to really warm you up, largely by raising you blood pressure by 20mmHg, go and read Shelley’s newly ‘rediscovered’ Poetical Essay. It’s a doozy; make sure you read the preface too. He’s lucky he’s already dead- he’d be on a database as a ‘non-violent combatant’ as sure as eggs is eggs. Percy, no matter how unlikely, given your ridiculously rackety lifestyle, I hope hosts of angels tend to you for all eternity.
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