If I tell you that I’ve been re-reading Frances Hodgson-Burnett’s ‘The Secret Garden’, what would you deduce from that? Yep, I’m so stressed, I fear my head might actually explode. I believe that most people have these stress markers – the mental equivalent of a security blanket. Mine? Easy.
What a week! Having spent the week being a nutter-magnet as usual, TGIF! The wretched full moon didn’t help, and God only knows what effect a blood moon has. Actually, I am yet to see any sign of images of this so-called red moon. All the ones I’ve seen just show ye olde regular moon; must have missed it.
It’s been an interesting couple of weeks, what with the football, Trump, and the Brexix debacle. Firstly, the football. England did not win the World Cup, thereby depriving me of my hat trick. They should have won but it was not to be. I blame the people who were in favour of ‘strategic losing’ with regards to the first Belgian game which wrecked the mojo of the whole thing.
What else did I do in New York? Well, I walked loads, just taking it all in. Went to some of my favourite places: MOMA, St.Patrick’s, the Fred.E.French building, the building of absolute beautifulness, or the Chrysler Building as I believe other people refer to it, Barnes & Noble (can I just say how much I love this store. I wish I could just put a futon in a corner and move in xxx). I even made it downtown to the new WTC site though I have to confess I wasn’t sightseeing, I had business there. I ran into one of those hypervigilant FBI types with a shaven head, extremely alert eyes, and no hint of a smile whatsoever. I asked him for directions, just for my own amusement; I could see him considering whether to put me in a headlock or not. Too many witnesses 🙂
I’ve also noticed that my pics seem to have a heavily food-related theme. Hmm. I ate loads but because I walked so much, I actually lost a couple of pounds while I was away. RESULT! That fab-looking breakfast was from my fave, Brooklyn Diner, and the market pic is from the Grand Central Station food market. The sweets photos are of The Sugar Factory which was extremely expensive but very nice. I bought white and dark chocolate gummy bears, apple flavour haribo-style sweets and red velvet caramels. Incredible. I also found peach-flavoured haribos in Duane Reade. Who knew? What a great shop- also the source of Goldfish crackers and Ghirardelli chocolate. I believe they have a pharmacy attached also, but who cares? To top it all, I discovered a new fave restaurant for breakfast: Smith’s bar on 8th avenue. I ordered the Lumberjack breakfast. The waitress smirked when I placed my order. It consists of one plate-sized waffle with syrup, and on the other plate, 2 sausage patties, 4 rashers of bacon, 3 scrambled eggs, home fries and toast. I also drank four cups of coffee. She removed my plates with what I can only describe as reverential awe. Amateurs 🙂 I have to admit that I didn’t eat all the toast, and the waffle did have a strawberry on top of it so it was practically a diet breakfast. I highly recommend it if you have easy access to a defibrillator. I was engrossed in my novel and a couple came and started asking why it was so interesting. We got chatting etc, and I told them about AlaraApothecary. The lovely man said ‘Oh, that’s why you have such beautiful skin!’ So there you have it, I couldn’t have come up with a better endorsement if I’d paid cash.
Post brutal jet lag, I’ve been working and sweltering. I also made a bold prediction that England will win the world cup. Readers, I have been mocked, pitied, and sneered at. Just wait and see: I’m hoping to complete my hat trick of Brexit, Trump, and the World Cup. And yes, I know they’ve just lost to Belgium. Pish posh, I’m still right; they are going to win. I leave you with my all-time fave cartoon song, from the inimitable Ren & Stimpy. Warning: it’s an ear worm. Log!, from BLAMMO!!
I just returned from my adopted home from home New York, which I haven’t visited for FOUR years! Yes, I know, first world problems, but still…. After Lagos and London, NY is my favourite place in the world. I even love it more than I love Florence. Mamma mia! NY, I love you like a fat kid loves kale…..just kidding, I meant cake 🙂 And please don’t bother to write in about fat-shaming, I’m no size zero myself.
Anyway, there I was at JFK. As soon as I encountered the unsmiling immigration guy who resolutely refused to laugh at any of my jokes, (and I can be really charming when I put some effort into it 🙂 ), I thought, ‘I’m home!’. I realised how much I’d missed it – the tedious traffic jam from Queens to Manhattan, that series of clapboard-clad houses you always see before the skyscrapers start, and what I’ve now finally identified as the absolute typical smell of Manhattan in the summer: a strong smell of food with a tinge of sewers. Ahhh, Bisto! The Trump hate-fest was in full swing which entertained me endlessly. It was hilarious watching the totally baffled liberals scratching their heads and trying to figure out how the Commander-in-Chief of the Deplorables managed to get North and South Korea talking. Cheer up, it may still end with Armageddon and you can all say ‘I told you so’ as the Earth is reduced to a pile of rubble. I had the best time even though I was only there for 5 days and 3 out of the 5 were spent running around on business.
What did I love this time? The usual first: that feeling that absolutely anything can happen. I was walking towards St.Patrick’s and suddenly came upon hundreds of young people clad in white graduation robes and mortar boards, looking for all the world like a massive flock of seagulls. I filmed the video in this post as I was innocently ambling down W. 43rd St. Suddenly one of the two guys switched on a portable speaker and they started to rap along to the instrumental music. I of course immediately started to follow them in the opposite direction of my actual destination. It took a while for me to realise they were paying absolutely no attention to anyone else and I started filming. The best part? Everyone coming towards us kept a totally straight face and completely ignored them, and as soon as they passed them, their heads swivelled and jaws dropped. It was exactly like what happens on the Tube in London when some nutter tries to start a conversation. It’s one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. I don’t know the song but if it’s their own composition, I would totally buy it.
I’ve missed the amazing sunsets blazing in the sky between the skyscrapers, the way the Empire State building turns to gold in the evening, the dodgy hot dogs and ridiculously salty pretzels; I shudder to think what my cholesterol level and blood pressure are post-NYC. The pal I travelled with resolutely refused to touch anything from the food stands but then she ate Popeyes chicken twice so people in glass houses…. I walked a gazillion miles and found that by day 2, other tourists were asking for directions so obvs, I looked totally at home. It was amusing to see their reaction when I gave directions in a British accent. I had the best time even though the trip was ruinously expensive because it was confirmed at the last minute. If you haven’t booked your holiday yet, forget the beaches and adventure holidays. Go to New York and play botulism roulette with the food carts. I’ve never been ill from one of those concoctions and I’ve eaten hot dogs, tacos, and oh my, the most amazing Philly Cheesesteaks but then I was brought up in hardcore Lagos, eating from food stalls that would make Bear Grylls blanch, the wuss ….. I miss it already. Oh, and the Trump Tower photo? That’s a special for Sarah; I know how much she loathes The Donald, I just couldn’t resist. Have a glorious week.
