Kafka Lives

I can’t believe how long it’s been since I posted here. It’s been a pretty awful time with several totally unexpected bereavements, none from Covid-19 although I know for a fact that at least one of the death certificates says otherwise as per the ridiculous reporting protocols doctors are working under. Quite frankly, the losses are grievous, the causes irrelevant. It hurts as much irregardless of cause. I’ve been trying to process all that and I didn’t want to bring anyone down. We are all having our issues with all these shenanigans as it is without me making your day worse. Apart from that, work has been frantic also and I am pleased to announce the launch of two new products: SuperGlow Hero Face Cream and Du Calme, Du Calme Face Cream. They are both fantastic; SuperGlow Hero is a rich cream which contains Hyaluronic Acid and Proteasyl so use it to banish or at least soften those lines, and Du Calme² is lighter and contains Chamomile Extract, Witch Hazel, and Frankincense so it’s excellent for both sensitive and older skin. They are pretty awesome and can be used as either day or night creams and are currently priced at an introductory £24 with free p&p in the UK, saving £13. Just enter voucher code GORGEOUS at checkout.

Business bit over, I’m currently champing at the bit, waiting to go on holiday. I’m veering towards the Paris option because I can go by Eurostar so none of that airport hypertension, plus croissants plus coffee etc etc 🙂 but who knows where I’ll end up. The last five months have been mental and I’m pretty much running on fumes now. It will be extremely weird going on my hols as a masked crusader. The incomprehensible mask rules, ye gods and little fishes! Having worked all through the most intense periods of Covid with zero protection, it is absolutely preposterous to be told to mask up when the death rate is practically in single figures even with the creative counting. Apparently having any type of healthcare or food handling qualification means you can’t catch or spread Covid in your own store. However, should you venture into the cafe or shop next door, you are immediately at risk of imminent death or may very well kill everyone in that store. Double blimey, the science is so rubbish it makes my teeth hurt. As for the flimsy clingfilmesque visors, words fail me. Plus riddle me this – if the masks protect us from catching and spreading viruses, why do we all need to get the flu jab this winter? Do the magical masks only work in the summer? Answers on a postcard, please. All this is the scientific equivalent of nails being scratched across a blackboard, fo’ reals. Although the law is the law, I strongly suspect that the government might have to think it out again like Fagin in Oliver! Because we are AlaraApothecary and we cheer you up, I leave you with this splendidly apposite skit from the inimitable Seinfeld, and a remarkably prescient skit from Hale & Pace. Happy days. Have a wonderful weekend.